The other night I saw "Miracle" with the Brooks Hall Staff sans Eric. I must say it was a really good movie. Kurt Russell honestly seemed to envelope me in his character. Also the cinematography was awesome. There were some really clean shots. Everything was so smooth, and there was this really great shot of Kurt watching game film on the Russians in the dark and you could see the reflection of the game film in his reading glasses. Ice cold.

The movie was great and it made me feel really patriotic... for a little bit. But a few minutes after the movie, it kind of began to have the opposite effect. I'm really sorry, but lately, I'm not so sure I'm really all that proud of America.

Now please, let me preface this. I love America. I truly believe in our Constitution and the principles upon which it was founded. However, I feel kind of like how I would imagine a Hebrew would have felt around the time that the Kingdom of Israel split. I mean, here we are, the greatest country in the world. Even people who earn half of what would be considered below poverty level are still better off than 90% of Africa (and most of the world). But we're getting away from what we meant. I feel like we're only paying our founding principles lipservice, and crappy lipservice at that.

I'm not blaming Republicans or Democrats or Big Oil or DuPont or Microsoft because I know that we as voters have done nearly nothing to voice our concerns. We, as consumers, are still driving our SUV's, painting our houses with toxic substances to keep the property value up and this blog is being written on a computer with a Windows XP Operating System. You, me, I and WE are all to blame.

It hurts me to say these things. But what really hurts is that I truly mean them. When I see our political leaders arguing over whose fault it was that we went to war and I hear people ask about whether we're safer today than we were before and bla bla bla, I just wonder why we were asking such stupid questions. If we were being good Christians we would have turned the other cheek until we knew for sure what was up.

I mean, why is it that America's safety always has to come at the expense of some other freaking country?

I just don't think America is really all that serious about life. I don't think we're living in reality. We are a culture that has become selfish and self-centered. For example, we're a culture that now celebrates being a teenager. With MTV aimed at teenagers, smoking adds aimed at teenagers, clothing stores, video games, tv shows, songs, restarant adds etc. etc. etc. -ALL aimed at teenagers. The adolescent years are the most selfish, self-centered and generally horrible years of life, -yet our culture celebrates them as the "Best".

But when all is said and done, I still love America. I guess this is why it hurts so bad to have these feelings. I want so badly for her to heal, because I know, just like any teenager, the capacity she has for good.

I'm going to try and do my part to support her. I'm going to do my very best to raise good children, should the Lord so bless me. I'm going to vote for the people whom I think is best for my county, district, state and country. But most of all, I'm going to pray everday for Jesus to touch me and others that he may allow us to be his tools for fixing a broken world.

As I think back about the two hours after the movie, in my mind's eye I can remember looking around the table at IHOP where our staff was joined by Eric and we just spent some quality time. As I looked at the amazing men sitting with me with me at the table, I felt hope strengthen my heart.